Just some tips I’ve collected from the serial killers of tumblr
just reblogging with my original tags because people liked them:
#murder tips #thats an odd tag #just posting a series of murder tips #nothing big #people reblog this #this is gold #COME ON REBLOG #what can i tag this with so more people will see it #murder #killing #blood #i guess #um #stabby stab #shooty shoot #CATCH A MARLIN #okay thats all i got
My mother actually told me you can dig a hole in the ground and put the body in with chopped up limes it will dissolve every thing but the teeth.
I can just imagine:
"Hey mom, do you know any good murder tips?"
"Hmm, well I know a pretty good one about limes"
I just told my dad that I was reading ways to get away with murder and he says
"Good, your mum is being a bitch lately"
Please dont let my dad on tumblr oh my god
i just figured out the perfect murder
kill someone and bury them in their own garden
that way if the police find them they’ll think it was a suicide
#welp looks like the victim committed suicide and promptly buried themselves in their garden #how considerate of them
how hard.. . how fUCKING hard is it… to not be cissexist…. if u are talking about a vagina… just say vagina. dont say female anatomy. dont say girl parts. say vagina. if you are talking about a penis, do not call it male anatomy or manmeat, call it a penis. it is THAT simple. just call them by their names. it is that easy to not be a cissexist shitcanoe
Here’s the reason i need feminism. I went to a party not long ago with some good friends, and i met a guy who couldn’t understand i didn’t want him - he kept coming at me, saying things like: “you want it, you just don’t know it ‘till i give it to you” and “fucking whore, you’ve slept with half the men in here, it’s only fair i get some too”.
I felt imensely uncomfortable, and i tried getting away from him - i was really scared, to be honest.
I ended up with going into the kitchen to Call my parents and tell them to come and get me, when he came from behind and grabbed me hard on my breasts, telling me i DESERVED what i got. He twisted my breasts so hard i have huge bruises, both underneath and on top of my breasts; including some hard bitemarks on my arms, neck and shoulders.
A friend came and saw it, and helped me get out, but i’m still scared and uncomfortable.
I’m sick of THIS. Of men (granted, only a few) thinking they hear yes when i say no.
I need to make it clear that this happens. I could have gotten raped, if not for my friend helping me out.
And it’s scary.
I’m begging you, reblog this or do SOMETHING so people can see that this happens; the police told me it didn’t “count as sexual assault, seeing he didn’t penetrate me, and because it has been two days, they can’t do anything, because his DNA would have been washed off by now”.
Please, let people know that feminism isn’t just women wanting to get a hugger paycheck, or just saying these things; IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME AND IT HURTS AND IT IS SCARY TO BE A PART OF.
Some men I swear.. God.
Honestly I don’t think you need feminism for that, I think you need a knife or some other weapon. maybe feminism on the side
tumblr user @ytisuounis shut the actual fuck up
Your 20s Brilliantly Explained in Charts
these are the truest things I’ve ever seen.
i’m not 1701% certain, but it COULD even
be the same pair
#what if these girls are a couple #and Jim totally learned that the first week of classes when he hit on one and the other threatened to deck him in the face #and jim laughed and introduced himself properly #but he got to know them throughout the years in starfleet and they catch up every now and then #and he cheered for them when they totally got put on the same ship #and every times he passes them (bc they are ALWAYS together it seems) it’s always ‘hey ladies’ #a running inside joke of theirs (via)
i was outside eating a cookie and a saw about 5 ants just roaming around on top of the steps and i noticed there was only one ant that wasn’t holding anything like the other 4 where holding dorito bits or something and the ant seemed sad it wasn’t even going in the same pace as the other ants so i put a cookie crumb next to him and he picked it up and started running as fast as the other ants and i think i made that little ants day
I will never get over this scene. I just love the fact that Disney acknowledges and makes fun of the fact that “It’s A Small World” can be the most annoying song in the world. Not to mention the fact that some of the adults watching this movie would understand this reference and relate to it.
Story time! Gather round children~
A few summers ago I got a summer job at WDW and one day while I was working I started to sing It’s A Small World to myself, and I was walking around and all of a sudden I hear this guy howl the word “no” in a really Scar-like voice and one of my fellow cast members pops out of a storage closet and says “ANYTHING BUT THAT” so we did a duet of “I’ve Got A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts” and then went our separate ways
one of the most amazing stories I heard..
let’s build a wall they said, it’s gonna be safe they said….
one: building a wall doesn’t work
two: building a wall doesn’t work
i bet yancy’s last words before he got ripped out of the conn pod were ‘raleigh listen to me don’t build a fucking wall’
#LIKE WHAT WAS EVEN THIS PLAN??? #JUST SLOWLY LET THE PACIFIC OCEAN FILL WITH KAIJU??? #A GIANT KAIJU BUBBLE BATH PARTY IN THE PACIFIC OCEAN OR SOMETHING??? #A WHOLE KAIJU HABITAT BEHIND A WALL LIKE IT’S FRICKIN SEA WORLD??? #WHAT WAS THIS PLAN????????
They were definitely going for the ‘close your eyes and hope it goes away’ plan.
They probably called it the Ostrich Offensive.
'RALEIGH LISTEN TO ME DON'T BUILD A FUCKING WALL'